Goblin Cock @ Highline Ballroom

Goblin CockNEW YORK, NY—Dude, this show rocked.

Yeah, not the most eloquent way of describing Goblin Cock’s swing through New York City, but fancy words don’t fit a band like Goblin Cock—not their music, not their attitude. Certainly not their name.

The project of Rob Crow (Pinback, Optiganally Yours, RRC III, et al.) that seems to be his priority at the moment, Crow and the men (as far as I know) of Goblin Cock took to the stage at the sadly underpopulated Highline Ballroom fully covered in pitch black monk robes a la Sunn O))). They took it a step further, in fact, by wearing black see-through mesh masks—you know, the ones that you picked up Halloween night at the Rite-Aid because you were grasping for straws for a costume—with the exception of Crow, who more than made up for it with a killer beard. Along with the heavy use of green and purple lighting, constant strobe lighting and a hokey-looking skull atop the rarely used keyboard, if you didn’t know any better, you’d think they were trying to make a statement.

Nah. They’re just fucking around.

But it seemed the joke was a little lost on, well, almost everyone. I’m a pretty reserved dude, so if I’m the one doing the most headbanging at a show, something’s seriously wrong with the crowd, or I’m the only one there. If Rob Crow and the guys were up there in white t-shirts and blue jeans with a humble attitude—rather than the constant horn-throwing and grumbling “Goblin Cock!” in a growl far deeper than any of their songs approach—the charm wouldn’t have been the same.

And Goblin Cock is oodles and oodles of charm, with the riffs to back it up. They ripped through the material of Bagged And Boarded and Come With Us If You Want To Live in record time, never wasting any time between songs to do more than adjust their tuning and grunt. They even had enough time to play abbreviated covers of Frankie Goes To Hollywood’s “Relax” and Tears For Fears’ “Head Over Heels,” the latter of which I admittedly needed to check my phone to recognize the band. Sorry Tears For Fears, you’ll always be “You Spin Me Right Round” to me.

It was a perfect evening, if not for the apathetic New York crowd that seemingly decided it wasn’t going to like the show before it even happened. Nothing like a bunch of do-nothing 20-somethings acting snobby to possibly ruin the chances of seeing Goblin Cock come back around again. Thanks guys.